Many men ask me about the woman in their life, “How can I make her more Dominant?”
Well, first of all, you can’t make her do anything. And buying a vanilla woman a whip and nipple clamps for Valentine’s Day and telling her she can use them on you however she wants isn’t likely to be met with anything like you fantasized.
If you think printing out pictures of sexy Dommes and buying her a leather bra is going to illicit anything close to “Domme of your Dreams”, think again. She is probably thinking you are comparing her to the sexy internet porn women of leather and latex, and going to hide the bra and never talk about it again.
The best place to start is by serving her(what a novel concept!), not telling her what you want to done to you. After all, Fem Dom is all about her, is it not? What’s her favorite kind of coffee? Bring it to her in bed. What makes her feel sexiest(NOT what you think she looks sexiest in)? This might be silk pajamas, and not the leather bra and thong you were imagining. In order for a woman to begin feeling ‘Dominant’ (I hate using the term that way, because it’s not something you put on like a pair of shiny boots, but instead a way of being. At the same time, one can feel more or less Dominant, depending on their mood) she has to feel confident. This is going to vary from woman to woman, but if you’ve known her for very long you will know what makes her feel like she’s Queen of the Universe. You need to tap into that.
Examples of what you can do to serve Her:
-Do her least favorite chore. Don’t say anything about it, just do it extremely well.
-Is there something she’s been eyeing in a magazine, in the store window? Treat her.
-Don’t initiate sex for a whole week. When she does, please her completely. Don’t even involve your cock in the equation. Masturbate beforehand if necessary.
-This might seem hokey, but I encourage the use of ‘sex games’. Whoever loses gets to be the other person’s “slave for a day”. Make sure you lose. This kind of ‘permission’ might let her do things she might not normally.
-Boys into cuckholding: Ask her how she feels about the idea of an open relationship where the woman could have sex with whoever she likes, but the guy never did. A lot of women would be refreshed by this option.
– Very few people dislike back rubs. Watch some YouTube videos for some techniques if you feel completely hopeless. Include dim lights, a candle, and massage oil or lotion. Nice music a plus.
The most important thing to keep in mind is that once you start doing all these nice things for her, she doesn’t ‘owe’ you anything. You don’t deserve a beating or a strap on fucking just because you gave her a night off from chores last week. Start with her interests and go from there.
