Being somewhat a connoisseur of strap-on play, I have a lot of opinions regarding the equipment. Whether you are a lady purchasing one for yourself(or partner), or a male wishing to gift a strap on harness(and dildo!) to your lady friend, here are some tips on selecting the right one.
First things first: There are two parts to a “strap on”. The harness, and the dildo. You want one in two parts for easy cleaning, comfort, and quality. So don’t ask “how big is your strap on?”. It’s only as ‘big’ as the dildo you choose to wear with it.
There are lots of terrible strap on harnesses out there. Most of the really bad ones look like ugly underwear with a dildo glued on the front, all one peice. These are nonsense and don’t work.
Also, avoid:
Non-Adjustable Elastic Straps – no support.
“Thong” Styling – uncomfortable, not enough support.
Hard to Clean Materials(soft fabrics)
Rubber(unless you’re really into that 😉 – Sticks to the skin, uncomfortable.
What you DO want to look for:
Hard-wearing materials like leather, neoprene, nylon, etc. These are also easy to clean. Make sure to use a cleaner appropriate for leather, also!
Jock strap styling. Two straps come through the legs, hugging the bottom on either side. This is much more secure and will prevent the dildo from flopping around.
Metal or hard plastic fasteners/buckles. You want it adjustable between partners, and for comfort. Depending on what position you and your partner are in, you may want the harness tighter or looser, higher or lower.
A piece of material between the base of the dildo and the wearer. This provides comfort. Having a dildo base pressing against the pubic bone is a non-erotic kind of pain. Even better if it’s a bit padded.
Choosing a dildo:
Obviously this is a very personal choice, but for beginners, go smaller rather than larger. Make sure the dildo is smooth(silicone is really the best choice for any penetrative sex toy) and has a flat and wide base that will not slip out of the harness. Straight or a very slight curve tends to be the most comfortable for most people. Also, I tend to prefer longer and thinner to wider and shorter. This doesn’t mean you have to go deep, but you can have a longer stroke option and go as deep as you like.
Hope that helps!
Happy Fucking,
Miss Kelle